Behind brown Eyes

Yes, it may seem unfair, for me to say I feel hated or faded...So many people have it worse, but actually how can we be sure about that? Are we interested in them? Do we know their sorrows just because we seem them falling apart in front of us? There are so many things behind each thought, then how can we be sure there aren't other, more powerful and ragged stuff pilled up inside or behind a normal smile.I can admit it, I have never believed there was such a large scale of different problems all with the same prospect or treatment. And still you don't know how it will affect you. Unfortunately, the only people that may know how to describe this feeling, are those who had been on the ground, those strong, independent creatures who may as well be described as "above the average human being". Nevertheless, it must hard to accept such a meaningful compliment, isn't it? It's like telling yourself that, in order to become a successful bank manager you have to be torn into little pieces, scattered around the floor and then stomped on. Who would agree to such a cruel and brutal fate? It doesn't seem as a fair price at all... And to be honest, no one gives a damn if the floor was clean or not, we might not even know if somebody did it on purpose, toyed with us, playing with the key pieces of our puzzle. But in the end, when you realise you are, just a fragment of the biggest nothing you had ever imagined, what would you do? You don't even have a face, your heart is just an emotional record on tiny bit of memory, we can as well call it, individual cd. Yes of course...We could blame it on someone else, but then again, he's far away, maybe eating a hot dog, or sleeping on the sofa, who knows? Nothing would turn that useless thought away, words as " He'll get his share of problems " will seem relunctant, almost disturbing and empty. We truly are individualists, aware of it or not, how can we experience an unconditioned love, when we are so eager to receive affection/trust/protection and yes...love. Who does actually realise that one of the most important things on earth is how/when will you discover yourself, most of us, just think and spend time fantasizing about less complicated ways, if not effortless ways of enjoying the ride. Come to think of it, that's the reason why I had always hated cheap lines head in film, like : " Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome on board, please put on your seatbelt on and enjoy the ride...", oh how these words had tortured me in every possible and it will also torture you, my dear strangers, but it will wait for that prescise moment when you feel like everything is going smooth for unknown reasons...Wrong answer...So many of you, might now ask themselves the question: " Ok...So what's the point?". Well my point is stop searching for a point, or you'll just end up with this huge headache like I did...People will always mess it up, it's part of the cleaning process...